Monday, March 31, 2014

Marriage Act UK.

Gay marriage has become legal in the United Kingdom.  Seemingly both the Anglican Church and the Catholic Church will have none of it.  There is also supposed to be 22% of the population that is opposed to it.  I am not sure what difference the new law in the UK will make.  They already had “civil partnerships” which seemed to have all the legal rights of marriage.   
So is it just a question of a change of name?  Personally I see procreation as somehow integral to the definition of marriage.  Unions of love between partners of whatever sexual composition should, of course, be blessed because they are a blessing.   

Some of the confusion in societal and ecclesiastical thinking might not arise if we could manage to keep the two values, love, and sex as clearly distinct.  It is true that in empirical reality they are not really separable, but distinct they remain, as values, nonetheless.   Of course, the Church shoots itself in the foot by not wanting to accept sex as a value.

Saturday, March 29, 2014


A correspondent wrote: One scripture that my mom believed in sincerely was that we were to pray unceasingly, and she taught me that one way to do this was to praise God when I saw beauty revealed in nature. She said that we should never ignore the wonders of God's creation. Since I was a little boy, I've held fast that belief. When I'm driving in the mountains or I see beautiful flowers, I praise God. I even try to recognize his part in man-made works like amazing art, architecture and music.

Well, I noticed that when I look at naked men, my initial instinct is to praise God - but my sense of sin, guilt and damnation always "caught" the words before the left my mouth. Not long ago, after admiring a glorious hunk, I just said to myself, "God knows I find this guy attractive ... and God designed him ... so I might as well praise God for him." After all, doesn't the Song of Solomon do just that? So now, when I look at a beautiful man, I praise God. When I see an impressive dick or ass, I praise God. It is His design, and I do enjoy and appreciate it so much. I hope this isn't sinful. But I had to laugh at myself that I was "hiding" this admiration from God.  Love your site!!!!"

My reply to him was: “That, to me, sounds just fine. I would go further and praise God for the beauty of sex between men. A man fucking another man, a man sucking another man is to me an act of supreme wonder and beauty. God has to be praised for it. As he has for what we experience when we are one of the men in the act.
Can't we see watching porn as an act of prayer that we do not have to hide from God?

I did a series of posts on the blog on the Song of Songs as a poetic expression of gay eroticism and spirituality starting in October 2012, if you scroll back.
Thanks for being a faithful reader and for your interaction!”

Thursday, March 27, 2014

The Porn Complex

I was intrigued by Rick (Torn Jeans)’s comment on my post “Living with Porn”.  Rick said: “Thank you for sharing so now I understand why I like Joe Gage so much and Conner! They know something most men do not, but you and me are understanding now.”  I am trying to identify what it is that Joe Gage and Conner Habib know that most men do not.   
Starting from the most men side of things, I suppose that society has most men vastly complexed about their sexuality, and even more so about their use of porn.  Because, let’s face it, there must be few men in the world who resist totally the allurements of porn.  But the problem is that so many feel guilty about it, feel that they are doing something that they ought not to be doing by enjoying their attraction to sex, by indulging their eye for good erotic performance, by feeling their solidarity with other males.   

Few, indeed, manage to take the bull by the horns and accept within themselves that sex is good, that the solidarity they feel with other males to the point of playing and wanting to play erotically with them is totally good and natural.  The fact is that it is very difficult to shed the guilt, the negative attitudes totally because society itself does not yet accept the rightful place, the naturalness of gay porn in the world of human entertainment and sensitivity.   

It is all a Christian hangover, it is all part of the effort to maintain that sex is only for the bedroom for those thinking of having babies.  But sex is, but yet largely to be discovered as, a good, a wonder, an art-form in itself.  Men need to benefit society by celebrating mansex together.  But, wow, what a hesitation there is in society to accept this!

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

Deep Down in Your Balls

Our guru at Queer Heaven, in a post a few days old put into the words I have never been able to find just exactly what my conviction is about the mystique of gay sex:

“Queer Heaven is that state of mind where all things sexual are possible.  It is that place in your soul that knows exactly who you are and what you want.  It is first and foremost the essence of your being. The deep down in your balls feeling of knowing that man to man sex is what you are all about.  Queer Heaven is the spiritual and human response to the culmination of being a man who enjoys Dicks and Asses for fun and pleasure.
Queer Heaven is the sublime feeling one gets when you allow yourself to be so true to yourself and let everyone know.  Queer Heaven is Fucking and Sucking of course, but much more. It is also the amazing bond that happens between two or more guys who share themselves sexually.   Even if it is just a quick Fuck with some random unknown still is confirming who you are and why you are here in ths lifetime.  
So.... take advantage you have of this major gift of being a gay man. Play hard, play often and if it is in your comfort zone.... have as many sexulal partners as you think you need.   I understand that are some men who are completley satisfied and fulfilled having just one Dick in their life. And that is the way they are fulfilling their Karma.  But for most of us.... one Dick or Ass would never be enough.
And if you feel that not try to be otherwise.  Be honest with yourself and enjoy the many,many pleasures of Your Queer Heaven.”

My thought develops his where he talks about how a quick anonymous fuck creates a bonding which confirms who I am.  It also gives me the occasion to do something for the other, bringing him to the confirmation of who and what he is.  This expresses the other-centredness that is very important to Christianity.  Queer Heaven has a very practical approach which I like.  See him in my blog list on the right.

Sunday, March 23, 2014

Living with Porn.

On his blog Conner Habib gives a link to an article about his film producer named Joe Gage.  There I found the producer expressing his understanding of man to man sexuality in these wonderful terms “Sex between men is more about camaraderie than romance, more about hot action than a lifestyle.  The author of the article in Butt magazine, Frank Rodriquez writes: “The man behind the legendary trilogy Kansas City Trucking Co., El Paso Wrecking Corp. and LA Tool & Die, Joe Gage, is the greatest gay porn director of his generation. He’s also the first artist who dared to suggest that sex between men was more about camaraderie than romance, more about hot action than a lifestyle.” 

In the interview Joe Gage is reported as saying he is in porn because he feels compelled to do it, not just because it is something he can do to make money.  There goes a man that enjoys his sexuality!

Do you enjoy watching porn?
I do, I watch porn all the time, I love it and watch it and collect it, and have it. I live it, I live with porn, porn is my life.
Do you like the work of other directors?
I like amateur porn the best, because it’s real. It’s real sex.
I’m into this because I’m compelled to do it, not just because I’m adept at doing it.
Sam: Somebody is going to make a movie sometime soon with really old fuckers.
They do already; I’ve seen them on the Internet.
I’m wondering, How old is too old?
Never, as far as I’m concerned, never if it’s the right person in the right situation. I don’t see why not, am I wrong?
There’re a lot of intergenerational scenes in your movies; not fetish movies like Daddy-Son or Grandpa movies, but in your stories, it just seems normal, it’s not treated as a fetish. You have all these different situations and sometimes, it’s like a guy in his 50s showing the way to someone who’s 20.
Because that’s the way it works. That’s how most people find out about sex. If they don’t have sex with a peer, they have sex with an older person. So why not show that? It’s like a power exchange, and the opposite of what you think is going on. It’s not an older person seducing a younger guy; it’s about a younger guy drawing an older guy into his sexuality.
I think a lot of times it’s the young people who are stalking older people. It is.
It’s the situation and the sexuality.  

I love the bit where he says that he enjoys porn, collects it, watches it all the time.  Society really needs a different understanding of porn.  Conner himself is so marvellously positive about sex and porn.  I guess he and Joe Gage are real kindred spirits.  I can also sympathize with Joe Gage when he says he likes amateur porn the best.  I like sex to look real too.  Anything posed takes second place, unless it really has artistic value.  That is another dimension that needs developing, the artistic value of erotica.  On another plane, perhaps we ought to investigate the aesthetic value of erotica.  Oh! sex has so much potential and driving force.